


Should have, Could have

by Amber_Flicker



Category: Dark Matter (TV)
Genre: Angst, Episode: s02e01 Welcome To Your New Home, Gen, Unrequited Love, i wrote this in like half an hour it's horrible, implied depression, oh the angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-05
Updated: 2016-07-05
Packaged: 2018-07-21 19:57:52
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 757
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7401766
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Amber_Flicker/pseuds/Amber_Flicker
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The aftermath. </p><p> </p><p>Spoilers for s2 ep1.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Should have, Could have

The funeral wasn't a complicated thing. It wasn't big, was less than the man deserved but all they could do.

 

Devon and Nyx were only around for emotional support. They had never known One, only heard the things said of him. Knew he'd been part of the family of the Raza. It wouldn't be right for them to not be there, now that they were a part of the crew.

Five was crying. Four stood beside her, silent as always, appearing unaffected, though they all knew better. Six was separated off from them, standing to the side. He seemed guilty. 

Three was in the back, barely noticeable, shadows concealing his expression. Two stood at the front. She was speaking, short, careful words as if she was barely holding herself together and wanted to get this done before anyone could view her true reaction. 

 

Three couldn't hear a thing.

 

Three couldn't feel a thing.

 

Two asked if anyone wanted to say anything. Five had already spoken through tears. Four wasn't the talkative type, just broken his silence to say 'he was a good man.' Six began to step forward and- no. Hell no. Anger sparked in Three, first emotion he'd felt besides _numb_ in days. He shoved Six back.

"You don't get to say _anything._ This whole damn thing is your fault."

"Three-"

"Shut up," he snapped, "If you hadn't betrayed us then he would still be alive. You don't even deserve to be here."

Empty silence met his words. He turned, daring anyone to contest the truth of the statement, desperately wanting to let out the pent up rage and grief and guilt and regret and- fuck. He couldn't do this here. He shoved past everyone and left the room.

 

It wasn't until some time later that he felt someone sit down beside him in the empty hall he'd found to hide in. Three didn't have to look to know who it was. His anger had cooled- the rest hadn't. Couldn't she let him alone in his misery? He wasn't up for avoiding questions.

"I loved him too, you know."

"I didn't-"

"We both know that's a lie."

He glanced at Two, glaring, ready to retort. Deny it. Then he deflated. There was no point anymore. "He deserved better. He shouldn't have died. If he did it should have been while he was doing something goddamn dangerous things because it was 'right.'" He'd always hated it when One brought morals into everything- didn't realize until now that it kept the rest of them from becoming the same people they were pre-memory wipe.

"I know. But we're not going to let Corso get away with it. Being mad at Six won't help us." 

"You can't tell me you're not."

"Oh, I am." She said, looking away. "I wouldn't have let him back on the ship if I didn't think he regretted it, though."

 

It was a long time before Three spoke again.

 

"He died alone. The last thing he remembered of me 'n you was us pointing guns at him."

"One knew by then that it was Six who betrayed us all."

"That doesn't mean he didn't feel betrayed by _us!"_ The outburst didn't seem to surprise Two. She knew him too well, waited, let him calm down until he continued. "He thought I _hated_ him, and it wasn't just because of that. I was just too _stupid_ to stop pushing him away, and even if i'd tried saying anything, he wouldn't have felt the same."

"But he did."

He stared at her for a moment. Then shook his head. "It doesn't matter now anyway."

"It matters to you." 

"Leave me alone, Two."

"Are you su-"

_"Go."_

 

She did. Three didn't move, melancholy aching in his chest holding him in place. He leaned his head back against the cold metal of the ship, tired from lack of sleep (the nightmares wouldn't stop) and everything else. Mind still racing with thoughts of what he never got to do, and never would. Missed opportunities and constant reminders of someone who didn't deserve to die. Out of all of them, not him. One should never have even been on this ship. Three should have seen past his own foolishness and realized that he wasn't the person to be pointing a gun at, all those weeks ago. He should have spaced Six for setting this into motion. 

Three things occurred to him:

 

One was dead.

 

Jace Corso was going to _pay._

 

And Three hated himself for what he did and didn't do.

**Author's Note:**

> *STILL VERY BITTER AND UPSET OVER ONE'S DEATH* Why does every show kill off my favourite character...
> 
> I had to write a fic about it. If I have to be miserable over it then so does Three.
> 
> This had a more hopeful ending, originally... This is my first time really writing Two or Three, my characterization might be off.
> 
> Keep up with my writing at http://cliches-and-coffee.tumblr.com/ (or scream about Dark Matter with at http://butfirst-wesavethegalaxy.tumblr.com/)


End file.
